So there it is...it happens just like that.... I was downloading the photos off my camera...and it stopped me right in my tracks--these were photos from 'before'...before IT happened...before time stopped...before my life as I knew it changed......before my dad died...
There they were...shots from the Cape, only just over a month ago... scenes from boat tours with the grandkids, a sandwich shop for a bit of ice cream in the rain, and those from his one of his favorite little stops, the Woods Hole Aquarium... as my dad told my nephew facts upon facts about the native seals and encouraged my three-year old to touch the lobsters. It was surreal to look at the scenes unfolding before my eyes, a mini slide show of life importing onto my screen as I watched it pass by...
I sit...recalling that day, and the one after that. and the others to follow...what did he say, how did he say it...trying so hard to remember, trying even harder not to forget..
It is still so hard, yet I keep watching, as now my screen is labeled
'last import' and somehow, someway,
and oh, so sadly, those words are true.
Heaven must have the most glorious pictures now.
It does.
ReplyDeleteI love you little sister.
ReplyDeletelove, me
My little sister gets me through it. I am scared I will forget my Mother's laugh. I AM SO VERY SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS. TRULY.
ReplyDeleteYour words go right to my heart. I have felt the grief that feels like something is pressing on your chest. The kind that makes it hard to breathe.
ReplyDeleteI know that intellectually you realize that the intense pain of grief abates. But, your father will always be there for you. You can call on him at any time.
I believe that God spiritually brings souls together for a reason. We all have something to give that the other needs.
Your father gave you everything that you needed, and in doing so he has prepared you to share those things with others.
It must please him that you so eloquently share your grief and experience.
I know how much pain you are going through.... I have lost both my parents and not a day goes by that I dont remember when we did this or that or have a laugh at something that was said or done... or shed a tear when I wish they were here to help me through a rough patch...
ReplyDeleteNot one person can say it will be easy for you.... everyone grieves differently and everyone has their own time when it will be less painful...
There are not words from any of us that can fix it ... though I truly wish there were
Your family is close and you have each other to call upon when you need that reassurance....
I know in your heart of hearts your know that we all care for you and pray that with each day your heartache will lesson a little bit more
Keep your memories close to you because they can never be taken away.... your dad was a good man
HUGS
JO
Your eloquent words are a true tribute of love. I am so sorry that your Dad passed away.
ReplyDeleteTina
I am right there with you, having lost my dad a year ago in March. I can't promise you it gets any easier, but I can see myself being more accepting of the fact. It presses on you, doesn't it? I can physically feel the pressing on my chest of the sadness.
ReplyDeleteIt is so hard to know what to say. Even though we have never met, I care that you are hurting and I say a prayer for you all.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear about your dad. I was raised by my grandmother, and she died very unexpectedly when I was in college. To this day, that remains one of the hardest periods of my life. You just have to give yourself permission to grieve for as long as you need to. At some point it does get easier. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteSuch beautiful words at such a difficult time. I am so sorry for your loss and send angel wings to wrap your heart in loving prayer.
ReplyDeleteKnow that your children have a grand guardian angel to take them through this world. Don't worry, you won't forget, and it will get easier. You're in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine what you and your sister are going through. Thank goodness you have each other to lean on. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm truly so very sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteKrissy